How to win in life and business

You have to be in it to win it, that’s what they tell us anyway. At the start of any new endeavor, there are countless possibilities and progress is easily made. I think most people are excited by this when diving into something new. This shiny new idea you’re itching for could prove to be promising or it could turn out to be a dead end, but what is guaranteed is that it will not come to fruition if you never give it a go.

Without a start, nothing happens. Unless you bring it to life, the passion for something new is nothing more than a fleeting idea that simply floats away. Starting is the action that breathes life into your idea. You have to take a leap if you want your idea to fly.

So is being in the race really the key factor in winning it? It is certainly true that you need to make a start to have any chance of succeeding, but given the high rate of failing business, healthy lifestyle initiatives and marriages, it seems just as reasonable to look forward to an unpleasant experience or even a failure.

There is no shortage of initiative. People dive into business ventures with visions of grandeur, despite statistics actually saying an entrepreneur’s new business will be gone in under 3 years.

I work with business people every day, looking at how they can take their business to the next level. Through this work, I have a lot of business meetings with successful business owners (the failed businesses are not having meetings to ramp their business up!) and often those owners have accumulated great personal wealth from their successful ventures. I attribute much of my business success to just matching and mirroring their successful styles.

Some of these owners are very intelligent and you can not help but be impressed with their business knowledge and acumen. The surprising thing is that most business owners are not super smart, and in the nicest possible way, I would consider some successful owners as a little slow. This realisation was a little hard to accept at first. I remember the day I said with confidence to my wife, “we are going to be very wealthy if silly old [insert business guy’s name – we took it out even though he agrees that he is not smart] can become a millionaire – hell we are so SMART it’s going to be a shoo- in!”

Yet intelligence is clearly not a defining factor that influences the likelihood of success. Among the most successful business owners I know and have worked with, I can confidently say I have found common traits and markers for success. Although my observations are directly related to business, there is a clear link between what I have observed as the keys to success in business and the keys to success in anything, including the business of a successful marriage.

I think as a culture we have totally misinterpreted the meaning of, ‘you have to be in it to win it’, and we use it at the wrong time. Saying this at the start of a new venture raises our hopes that by simply starting we too could be winners. Well that is just plain nonsense because winners are decided at the finish line, not at the starting line. Staying power – the ability to stay put throughout all the guaranteed bad news you will likely face to become a winner – is the REAL deciding factor. That is the common thread I have found with every successful business owner I have met. They are all, without exception, wholeheartedly committed to the success of the business. These are the types of people who will work by candlelight after the electricity gets cut off if that’s what it takes. It is their willingness to push through setbacks that has made their businesses successful.

The truth is none of us really know when the final bell will ring and without a “go down with the ship attitude”, you could be closing the door on a business or giving up on our dreams of professional music, sports or any other pursuit – when in reality the breakthrough you needed was only weeks away.

I have not met one successful business owner that does not have stories of near business death experiences. Most go onto say it has been the difficulties that have made their business stronger. So when the reasons start coming up about closing the business, and you’re looking at why it is not working, and how it the situation is beyond repair, go back and think about how you started out.

Realistically there is no failure until the moment you decide to give up.

You started out without a business and convinced yourself it was a good idea using statements about winning to reinforce your dreams. Whatever problems the business is facing, it has a lot more going for it now then when you foolheartedly started. At the start it was probably no more than a name and a tax file number. But at the start you had a pirate’s attitude, setting out to brave the high seas in a little boat. Well, go find that energy again, that attitude that got you rolling and you’ll be sure to find that this is exactly what you have lost. The business is not failing, but you are failing to bring the right attitude. Find that again and you will find the way for the business to roll on and unlock the potential of doing bigger and better things.

Although I have focused entirely on business owners here, you know as well as I do that this is just as applicable to learning, as it is to goal achievement and even the workings of a successful marriage. Businesses have a lot of moving parts and exist in markets that can not be controlled.

Becoming fluent in Mandarin is sure to fail if you do not practice, make excuses as to why you could not attend class, and eventually give up on the grounds that it was just not for you. All made up excuses. The real reason you did not win that race is that you stopped running.

Yes that’s right, YOU. You are the captain of the ship and you steer the direction.

So here are a few tips to keep you in the game:

1. Giving in at the first sign of trouble is your biggest mistake

It is the last Indian standing who will win and he gets everyone else’s arrows. Die or be that Indian. There is no escape. Always be a startup  – in business, in marriage, and in your whole life! It is THIS attitude that creates opportunities. It’s not easy when bad things happen, but the bad stuff is what makes you great.

2. You are the master of your relationships, businesses, and life

Yes, that’s right  – YOU are in control. Blaming circumstances out of your control disempowers you. Decide what you can change, decide where you can be better, decide the help you need and go get it.

This knowledge can truly help move you towards Better Life Living.